Coping with Thoughts and Feelings in Uncertain Times

Clare McCarthy, ATR-BC, LCPC

“The only constant in life is change”

-Heraclitus

People struggle with uncertainty, as our brains have a natural tendency to link uncertainty with threats and danger. Since the outset of human history, people worked diligently to make meaning of the stars—seeking to use their understanding of the cosmos to predict future events and avoid being caught unaware by events beyond their control.  

Yet, despite our best efforts, uncertainty remains. In the era of covid 19, uncertainty has escalated and taken on a new intensity. Not only are we uncertain regarding the origins and the physical ramifications of the virus, we are also contending with the uncertainly brought about by an adapting economy, the inconsistent and ever-changing vaccine roll out, and the fractious political environment. 

So what is to be done? Each of us is tasked with building the framework that works best for us as individuals, and through practice we can build and refine adaptive strategies to regulate our responses to uncertainty.  Using an art therapy perspective, I have found the following principles useful in managing my own responses to our uncertain times:

1.)  Feel your feelings

When we are in distress, we often seek to avoid and minimize our emotions in order to avoid and minimize pain. While this makes sense, in my experience this is seldom effective. Emotional avoidance can prolong pain, and minimizing our feelings can lead to confusion and increased self-doubt.  Instead, we can work to identify the emotions that underlie our experiences. Sadness, anger, joy, fear, shame, and guilt are healthy human emotions, and have a place in our lives. Having an emotional check-in through expressive art activities including drawing, painting, free writing, listening to music, and intuitive movement allow us to authentically experience our internal realities and accept them for what they are. 

2.)  Manage expectations

 In times of uncertainty, expectations can get in the way of acceptance.  Sometimes we don’t consciously recognize that we have a particular expectation until we are frustrated by not having an implicit expectation met.  Checking in mindfully with our internal expectations and the associated thought processes helps to recognize personal entitlements, recalibrate expectations that no longer fit, and set more realistic outcome predictions.  Taking one day at a time, and beginning each day with the intention of managing that day as a discrete entity can help to keep expectations manageable. 

3.)  Internal teamwork

Fortunately, in our uncertainly, we are not alone.  We each have at our disposal a unique internal framework created from our interactions with all of those people we have learned from and grown with throughout our lives. Drawing from this internal interpersonal resource can provide us with strength and tenacity that extends beyond what we ourselves may feel capable of alone.  Who do we admire in the face of adversity, and how would they frame this challenge or speak to us in order to provide solidarity and encouragement? What might they know that we are missing? How can their behavior best be emulated in a way that honors what they have show us? 

4.) Commit to developing your strengths

Each of us has personal strengths that make us uniquely qualified to handle the challenges of our lives. Circumstances of uncertainty and rapid change can become the catalysts that drive our development as resilient and tenacious people. While we do not know the future, and do not unilaterally control complex external events, we do have control of our internal stance. Committing to the stance of ongoing personal persistence and internal resolve is a worthwhile focus for our limited energy resources.